Surf’s Up – Finding your Flow

The holiday season across a diverse array of cultures is full of celebrations, recreation, down-time and the dreaded goal setting for the New Year.

Goal time – The discussions I have had on annual New Year’s goals were presented in two ways; the first is the individual is pumped up and primed for the new year for a clean slate and sets huge goals; the second is the I should have, would have and could have done that, but I didn’t last year.  I am not saying setting huge goals is bad, it is awesome – go ahead crush it and knock the cover off the ball, but find your flow.

 

Definition of Flow: The mental state of operation, proposed by psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, in which a person performing an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and enjoyment in the process of the activity. In essence, flow is characterized by complete absorption in what one does. Proposed by, this positive psychology concept has been widely referenced across a variety of fields.

 

According to Csikszentmihalyi, flow is completely focused motivation. It is a single-minded immersion and represents perhaps the ultimate experience in harnessing the emotions in the service of performing and learning. In flow, the emotions are not just contained and channeled, but positive, energized, and aligned with the task at hand.

 

It is not about discipline – and I will say that three more times, since some of the folks I mentor are steadfast in their thinking that is all that you need.

 

It is not about discipline

It is not about discipline

It is not about discipline

 

To me, discipline is about doing things in a precise way, with exact timing and in accordance with a strict regimen. It’s about doing things when and how they ought to be done, whether or not you feel like it at the time. Unfortunately, when it comes to finding our own personal routes to success, many of us get detoured or stuck by preconceived notions of what our journeys will require.

 

If you’re convinced that reaching your goals is going to require “discipline,” and that doesn’t happen to be your strong suit, it’s easy to get discouraged and to overlook the strengths and assets you do have — your own unique resources, friends, influences, strengths, and style.

 

 

For some discipline is all they need, but today we are faced with distractions and a shortage of time. It requires much more than discipline today to keep people motivated they need to find their own flow and tap into fluidity and creativity.  Leveraging all three rather than focusing on what will hold us back in achieving the goals set forth – getting into the flow.

 

Getting back to Csikszentmihalyi, psychologists have found that what makes people truly satisfied and fulfilled is not so much the achievement of any particular outcome or station in life, but rather the experience of being fully engaged in pursuits that require every bit of their attention and skill.

 

Application and Action

Flow does not necessarily require that we apply any one particular ability, but rather that we wholeheartedly invest those strengths we possess – it requires mindfulness, focus and flow.

 

Even the most challenging situation, the most intimidating goal, can become engaging when we commit ourselves to giving it the very best of our abilities and attention — and, perhaps more important, our conscious intention - mindfulness.

 

Are you Committed or Do you need to be Committed?

It's funny – the most ordinary situations create new perspectives.  I was speaking to a gentleman coming up in his career during a holiday celebration and this individual was clearly frustrated with his job.  The mental exhaustion and the general malaise primed me to ask “are you committed or do you need to be committed”?  Commitment and willpower are two powerful elements that are often elusive if the emotional dynamic is not there.  There was still a general sense of confusion from this individual on “when should I get myself focused for the day ahead”?

The “time is now”, bringing energy and initiative to your roles* every day show commitment. Caring more about your role and behaviors will show in the results you produce. Showing commitment can demonstrate your leadership potential to key influencers and lead to career opportunities. 

(* all of us have different and multiple roles throughout our lives, father, spouse, professional, artist, athlete, etc. – this applies to every role)

 

The primary source and ongoing frustration of this individual – How can you keep yourself and others motivated when peers commitments wane?

 

The simple answer is that “do whatever you do, but professionals need to take personal responsibility for their own actions and results”. The market is in a state of constant disruption, placing additional demands on the business that spreads throughout the entire organization. Keeping yourself and your peers motivated can show your commitment to the overall challenges and increased demands of your business. It can be challenging keeping up high performance standards when your co-workers’ commitment to their jobs fades. 

Consider these two elements to bolster commitment:

1. Putting People and Customers First - Striving for customer satisfaction shows your commitment to your employer’s objectives. Even if your job doesn’t involve interacting with clients directly, your role is contributing to the objectives in keeping your organization’s client base satisfied and growing. Handling every task with the idea fresh in your mind that your work impacts client, performance and ultimately your potential may also boost your pride in your work and lead to improved job performance.
2. Self motivation - Encouraging yourself to develop new skills, improve operations and process or take new risks to advance the business can awaken new levels of commitment. You own your success.
3. Collaboration & Teamwork – The concepts of reliability and trust are a much deeper issue and are the essential underpinnings of any successful team. Making significant contributions to any group task shows commitment to your group, team and organization. Displaying confidence in your ideas, skills and solutions is a trait that many organizations value. Being reliable shows commitment to your team’s objectives and an understanding of the part you play in a bigger picture. Taking on any form of leadership roles and organizing team members to cooperate with each other, or collaborate with other groups, shows a commitment to big picture achievement.

 

Desire is the key to motivation, but it's determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek.

Wild thing

Birthdays are great opportunities to recalibrate your goals and objectives. I have heard the common, "what's wrong with you and when do you sleep, as well as, "I have to get up at 3:30AM just to get a jump start on you". Energy, ideas and persistence is what matters - You never can run out of energy if you commit yourself fully.

Most of what society says is not to go for it, but to be safe so you can be comfortable. What is odd is that many people are uncomfortable and set goals to change that condition. I think of a poem entitled Self Pity, by D.H. Lawrence

Self-pity

I never saw a wild thing
sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
without ever having felt sorry for itself. 

While quoting D.H. Lawrence sounds incredibly pretentious it is meant to illustrate perceptions of motivation. The most valuable asset you have is not money it is your mindset and drive and various methods and creativity for achieving your goals and objectives.

There is no limit to action - Attack your goals ruthlessly.

There is no failure unless you quit - there is no shortage of ideas.

If you are not creating new problems for yourself you are not growing or moving forward. Find your passion! 

Mirror Mirror on the Wall - Memoirs from the Land of Make Believe

You cannot talk someone out of their perception; you can only listen, understand and then behave yourself into their new perception.

A recent discussion held with a former colleague spurred the ever present concept of personal branding, but more in the context of changing perceptions.  The fundamental element in changing perceptions is the search in understanding yourself and the perceptions of others. Most people do not want to accept the negative or constructive perceptions of their own brand.  This is exactly what transpired with the former colleague I had the discussion with over the last month but finally have gone past the life is not fair and asking for the scrapbook of photos and memories from the land of make believe.

When I tried to have conversations with this individual about behavior, there was zero acceptance of personal responsibility. It becomes instantaneously defensive and goes immediately into the “I am being judged and it is someone else’s problem, not mine”.  What is ironic is that in the management consulting profession it is a constant give and take in dealing with change, perceptions and different personalities.  The type of constructive criticism is meant to help to understand actions, but these types of individuals believe that these criticisms are meant to undermine their own actions. 

Trust and perception go hand-in-hand and I am sure you have all heard phases like; "You have to walk the talk," "Actions speak louder than words," or "They talk a good game." And I know that you are as tired of them as I am. But there is wisdom in these phases no matter how much we hate to hear them.

Issues do arise after we make promises to others. Most people understand this. They tend to judge individuals on how they handle these issues.

For some reason we believe that explanations will get us out of trouble. We would much rather justify our actions instead of understanding how our actions affected others from their point of view of the other parties involved.  

The only way to change someone's perception of you and your work is to change your behavior.

I know that sounds hard but really the main behavior you need to change is how you respond to issues and complaints. Listening to the constructive and negative comments to understand their point of view is the most important thing you can do. But listening is not enough. You then need to incorporate what you have learned. Granted you may not agree with their perception of the situation. Agreeing is not the point. Knowing what their perception is and how you have caused that perception is the point. Now you can do things differently if you want to change perceptions.

My former colleague and I came to a level ground where she understood this dynamic, but it was hard for her to reprogram herself overnight – and this is where I completely agree. Perceptions change over time. You cannot change someone's perception with one act. Therefore, overcoming your history will take time. This is not only important but crucial to your future success.

Will it be easy, of course not, but the benefits will outweigh the costs. 

1. If you want people to trust you then show that you are trustworthy - it is that simple. 

2. If you want people to talk to you, then show them that you care. 

3. If you want your people to bring you ideas and concerns, then listen and recognize their efforts. 

You cannot talk someone out of their perception; you can only listen, understand and then behave yourself into their new perception.

Brand New Day, Brand New Way

People have been asking what the first post was and why I posted. The blog was designed to address insights into the topic of personal branding through inquiries, existing relationships at work and in my personal life.

Many of the discussions that I have on this topic deal with work in standing out and getting noticed through the blur of activity.  The person you are in the office and the authentic self you are in the rest of your life are one in the same. The images and impressions you make in all contexts of your life relate to your personal brand.  As we march through the stages of life we need to be cognizant of those elements that are authentic to ourselves.

Breakthrough and Attack Your Goals

Breakthrough is about your personal potential and living the life you not only want, but ultimately need.  Standing out of the shadows and building upon the person you are today and who you will become.  Your personal brand is similar to that of the products and services you consume, use and love.  Every interaction you have either builds, maintains or erodes your personal brand.  I say interaction as it could relate to the people you meet, your thoughts and actions.

We spend most of our time externally ruminating over the “how-to” address the daily challenges and opportunities we face life.  The speed in which you address these challenges and opportunities is often valued more than the quality of your actions. Your actions are critical Very few people ask the question why, often hiding in the shadows or process and prescribed emotions. 

There is no magic bullet, algorithm or solution it requires time and a personal investment to truly understand yourself and who you want to become. It is about focus and goals - What does it mean to you personally of going all in? There is no limit to action - Attack your goals ruthlessly.

Attitude is the key to everything you do both personally and professionally.  We are often overwhelmed by the time, so speed takes over.  There is a natural comfort in being busy as we can delay and ignore the critical elements that will feed our personal brand, passion and goals.

This is the time to stand out, step out of the shadows by going within, quieting the mind asking the questions to ultimately shine.  Take stock in identifying who you are and what you need to assess your personal brand. Getting started should focus on who you are now and who you would like to be.  This requires introspection and basic questions – What’s working in my life and what’s not? What do I want or need? What’s best for me to focus on now?

The question I ask on a daily basis is “how can I breakthrough the static” and achieve my personal best – my brand? Find your passion in every role your have and demand more of yourself to maintain that passion.

48 Hour Principle – Focused Personal Productivity

Mental preparation is a broad topic within the arena of sports psychology – people use the term “pre-game” to adjust their mindset. The purpose of daily mental preparation is to create a mindset that lets you consistently perform up to your capabilities and talents in competition. Preparation requires discipline and a small amount of time at the end of each day.

 

Learn to start thinking more about how you shape your personal effectiveness through small adjustments in your daily or weekly planning.

 

Mindset and attitude are critical elements for defining and acting upon the future vision of your personal brand. The challenge more often than not is the consistency of your actions in realizing this vision in the near-term. I have discussed how we embrace speed as a driver to perceived productivity, versus getting quiet and focusing on what is needed to accomplish your activities and goals.

 

Many of us dive right into the weekend shedding the activities of the prior week only to come to the paralysis of Sunday night paralysis staring at a anxiety ridden schedule for the week – I once knew someone who characterized this as Sunday Night Syndrome. Instead of being frozen with the myriad of tasks, simply question; what do I need to do this week and how can I get my head around it?

 

Write it down

 

At the beginning or the end of each workday, schedule time for you to think…yes to think. Reflect on the day and plan your actions for the next day and the day after that. After a few days, you will be able to identify issues by examining patterns based on your own reflections.

• First focus on the activities you set forth to accomplish today or this week – what was accomplished?
• Then focus on progress and challenges and think about specific events and activities that cultivate, maintain or erode your personal brand or effectiveness. Write them down

• Which 1 or 2 events today indicated either a small win or a possible breakthrough? (Describe briefly.)
• Which 1 or 2 events today indicated either a small setback, erosion or a possible crisis? (Describe briefly.)
• Finally, prioritize for action. The action plan for the next day is the most important part of your daily review: What is the one thing you can do to best facilitate progress tomorrow?

• Outline activities you need to accomplish tomorrow – consider using the 48-hour rule working on tasks that are due in 48-hours.

 

Building consistency is critical not only for your personal effectiveness, but for shaping your personal brand. Take time every day to think – so much of what we do is in accordance to how feel, start thinking and you will see a big difference in how things you work on personally and professionally relate to each other.

How do you prepare yourself mentally and what rituals create a steady focus in your activities?

 

Personal Brand – Attitude is Everything

Attitude is everything in how you shape your character and personal brand.  How does your personal brand impact the organization, individuals and yourself?  Discover your own potential for leadership. There is so much literature on branding, brand you and other aspects of personal branding out in the web sphere, but I recently found one statement that clearly articulates personal branding in one sentence. I found the biography of Margaret Thatcher interesting in her development as an individual and leader.  One of her many quotes relate to your personal brand and your attitude.

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character. And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny. What we think, we become”.

I have used the statement moving from “complaint to commitment”,  throughout my career and for also self motivation. So much of today’s business climate and corporate culture is based on who care more about feelings than they do about attitude, thoughts and ideas.  Create a learning environment that moves past mediocrity and focuses on the commitment of thinking, new ideas and positivity. 

When You Can Control or Influence the Negativity

When you can control or influence the situation, use a systematic problem-solving process with the affected employees to improve the identified areas of negativity or complaint. Do this as quickly as you can to determine that negativity exists.

·         Identify any aspects of the situation that you can impact including providing feedback in your organization about the negative impact that is occurring. Sometimes you can influence an issue or a decision if you practice personal, professional courage and speak your mind.

·         Listen, listen, listen. Often people just need a sounding board. Be visible and available to people. Proactively schedule and engage people.

·         Challenge pessimistic thinking and negative beliefs about people, the organization, and the work area. Don't let negative, false statements go unchallenged. If the statements are true, provide the rationale, the corporate thinking, and the events that are responsible for the negative circumstances. Share everything you know about a situation to build trust with the workforce – take the emotion out and drive with facts.

·         Ask open-ended questions to determine the cause, and the scope of the negative feelings or reaction. Maybe it's not as bad as people think; maybe their interpretation of events is faulty. Helping people identify exactly what they feel negatively about is the first step in solving the problem. You can't solve a fog of unhappiness. Help people create options, feel included, and feel part of the communication and problem solving.  

If the negativity emanates from an individual, as a manager or performance leader you can:

·         Inform the employee about the negative impact their negativity is having on co-workers and the department.

·         Take the emotion out of it and use fact - use specific examples that describe behaviors the employee can do something about.

·         Avoid becoming defensive. Don’t take the employee’s negative words or attitude personally.

·         Focus on creating solutions. Don’t focus on everything that is wrong and negative; focus instead on creative options for positive morale. If the person is unwilling to hold this discussion, and you feel you have fairly heard her out, end the discussion.

·         Focus on the positive aspects and contributions the individual brings to the work setting, not the negativity. Help the employee build their self-image and capacity to contribute.

How is your Personal Brand contributing - Recognize Your Potential Part in the Negativity Cycle

·         Know yourself well enough to recognize internally when you are becoming negative.

·         Become aware of work situations in which you typically find yourself becoming defensive or negative. Because you are aware of them, try to recognize when you are reacting and avoid your typical negative reaction.  

·         Take a time-out or walk away by yourself when you have dealt with a stressful situation.

·         Spend some time alone thinking every day about the positive aspects of your work and life. You don't want to spend all of your time focused on negative thinking. If there is nothing positive to think about, examine the life and the brand you are choosing to create.

·         Learn to grow and create a learning environment. Focus on the big picture; don't get bogged down in the day-to-day.

As I have stated in other posts, “control is an illusion”. Recognize that the only thing you are truly in charge of is how you choose to react to and in any situation.  How are you going to breakthrough the clutter of negativity and let your personal brand shine with optimism?

Swan Dive into Commitment - 8 Simple Principles

The advantage of a small pond or big pond does not depend on size of the fish, but rather the tenacity and agility of the fish. Most of the time, I’d argue it is better to be a small fish in a big pond. There are a myriad of different reasons, but was reminded of this yesterday, when playing when competing against the best, you learn more, you get tougher and you are forced to keep improving and never rest on your laurels.

 

Always keep on exploring and testing your own personal boundaries. Consider whether there are any activities in life where if you chose a less crowded approach, where you up your game. The fish I was referencing before does not get tenacious by resting on its laurels.  Once you start doing that, game over, people are already surpassing you.

 

You want to mass so many advantages in your favor that, when time comes, when the opportunity presents itself, you can’t help but win. By incrementally improving various elements of yourself and your position, you can dramatically enhance your chances of success in whatever you’re trying to do.

Think about what you can start doing tomorrow to up your game.  What are you committed to do differently?

 

1. Commitment – How serious are you reaching this goal? Are you willing to do whatever is necessary to get the job done? A strong commitment is a powerful advantage.

2. Focus - Do you know exactly what you want or is it a more vague idea? Will you get distracted about other shiny objects? The clearer you are on exactly what you’re trying to achieve, the better.

3. Depth – How much do you know about this area of endeavor? A deep level of knowledge and experience is a huge advantage against common/foolish mistakes and ignorant plebes

4. Rationale – Are you fully aware of the situation that you’re operating in? The more you understand the landscape, the more effective you’ll be and the less likely you’ll be out maneuvered.

5. Team - Do you have the respect and trust of people who could help you get the job done? Start building relationships with key players before you need them.

6. Horizon Planning – Are you making your moves at the right time and with the right speed? Sometimes being patient is critical, while other times overwhelming velocity is the way to go.

7. Assets - Do you have the right tools & adequate funding to make this happen? The more you have on hand and the more you can obtain quickly/easily, the better.

8. Reset – What’s your backup plan if your approach fails? There is great advantage to being able to quickly & easily regroup and try again?

What are you going to do today?

Don’t Overvalue Risk and Undervalue Opportunity

Don’t Overvalue Risk and Undervalue Opportunity.  The true reality – we’re obsessed with risk and overly careful with steps to control our outcomes.  Guess what we don’t always get it right, I know I don’t always get it right.  Nobody’s perfect and mistakes are an integral part of the learning process in doing just about anything worthwhile.  It’s more important that we learn how to grow from our missteps rather than trying pointlessly to avoid them. Mistakes will only continue to haunt us if we don’t make an effort to address them is a straight-forward and pragmatic way   

 

Own it - Everybody experiences setbacks in your personal and professional life.    Things can and often do go wrong due to circumstances that aren’t completely under your control.  That being said, deflecting blame isn’t a particularly effective way to grow as a person.  If you really want to bounce back stronger from a mistake, you need to employ a high sense of agency.  Avoid the easy way out and don’t let your circumstances define you.  Identify the variables that were under your control and make an effort to handle them better. 

 

Stop and Step Back - One of the worst things you can do is try to slip under the radar and fix the problem without anyone finding out.  A small problem can have a wider impact through side effects than you might think.  It is like a little white-lie, when you were a kid; you have seen these types of things mushroom quickly. Once a problem is out in the open, it’s much easier to deal with effectively.   Should, Would, Could are all variables – you must ask yourself what are those things I need to do to take massive action to apply learning from my setback.  Step back for each setback before you set back in your approaches – It sounds like a tongue twister, but take time to think about it.

 

Apologize to those Affected - Sometimes your mistakes can affect others much more adversely than they do you.  It’s important, under these circumstances, to make a real and lasting apology.  Most importantly, apologize for “making” the mistake and for any effects that it might have had on them.  Don’t play the victim and try to issue a statement that is protective of yourself or your position.    Think of your personal brand and your reputation in the context of the set back.

 

Don’t play the Victim - Again, we’re back to the idea that you need to adopt a sense of urgency.  When you think about the mistake, think about how you contributed to its creation and identify factors in your performance that you can do improve on for next time. 

 

You’re not the only one who can learn from your mistakes.  There’s potential for you to help many others who might find themselves in similar situations.  After all, one of the primary goals in dealing with setbacks or mistakes is ensuring that the same ones aren’t repeated unnecessarily. 

 

Good Morning Sunshine!

Four Things – Breakthrough your Morning Routine

Stop dreading the morning and wake up with vigor and vitality, weather it is a slow rise or mind blowing excitement!  Simple things for anyone to do to use the morning hours before work to get that extra edge – or breakthrough boom!

 

According to Inc. Magazine, morning people have been found to be more proactive and more productive. In addition, the health benefits for those with a life before work go on and on. What four things you can do before 7AM.

 

Four Things – Breakthrough your Morning Routine

 

Visualization – Buckle up I am going to go a little new age with you, but guess what it works. These days we talk about our physical health but we often neglect the mental and spiritual. The morning is the perfect time to spend some quiet time inside your mind meditating or visualizing. Take a moment to visualize your day ahead of you, focusing on the successes you will have. Even just a minute of visualization and positive thinking can help improve your mood and outlook on your work load for the day. Bonus – this contributes exponentially to your attitude and “attitude is every baby”.

For all of the commuters out there – meditation does not require a dark room, candle and some incense, use what you have.  Close your eyes and block out the world for five minutes.  A good friend of mine used to think I snapped early in my career when I listened to ocean waves crashing on the beach. Do what works for you.

 

Prime the Pump - Most people that work out daily, work out in the morning. Whether it’s a morning yoga session, a frigid swim (Cap that is for you) or  the gym, exercising before work gives you a boost of energy (physically and mentally), for the day.

 

Pre-Game - Maximize your potential by mapping out your schedule for the day, as well as your goals and to dos. The morning is a good time for this as it is often one of the only quiet times a person gets throughout the day. The early hours foster easier reflection that helps when prioritizing your activities. They also allow for uninterrupted problem solving when trying to fit everything into your timetable. I tell people to schedule personal time to get oriented at any point of the day to be more thoughtful of what activities must be planned.

 

48 Hour Rule – What are you planning to do today that you need two days from now.  Operating ahead of schedule allows you to shape the final product versus the just in time results that are often marred with errors and not well thought through approaches. One hint for beginning your day, do that least desirable task first on your to-do list. Instead of anticipating the unpleasantness of it from the first drips of coffee through your lunch, get it out of the way. The morning is the time when you are (generally) better rested and your energy level is up. Therefore, you are primed to handle increasingly more complex projects. 

Bonus, your day will get progressively easier, not the other way around. By the time your work day is ending, you’re winding down with easier to dos and heading into your free time more relaxed.

 

Start small and build, the key is to build upon new habits to focus your efforts. “People only see what they are prepared to see.”

Do Whatever It Takes - Differentiating Yourself

People may think it’s an unconventional approach, but you have to stand out. People aren’t getting the job they want because they are not successfully cutting through the competition. You have to ask yourself does the decision for the role really have to do with the state of the economy - or is it simply that people are not breaking through the pool of candidates, whether there are one hundred or three in the hunt for the role.

Think about that - How are you going to differentiate

One of the professionals I mentor was thoroughly disappointed in the decision by the employer not to continue in the process.  I asked two simple questions; did you "own" the interview or did you make any mistakes? The second questions was how prepared were you for the role?  The answer was obvious to him and to me by the answer.

  People are making mistakes on the interview. They’re not preparing. If you have a job, you’re being overlooked for promotions and advancements because you are either an “under the radar player,” doing the minimal or you’re doing great things but no one knows. You must know how to sell yourself and your accomplishments.  Experience exposed me to a great volume of different candidates - People show up confused, poorly dressed and unprepared. They obviously didn’t do their research, they knew nothing about me or the goals of the organization. They share their personal problems and speak poorly of their last employer and blame others about their current situation in their interviews. 

Coaching the same individual for another prospective leadership role with a smaller organization - the rules are the same and actually heightened due to the entrepreneurial dynamic of the organization.  The basics he iterated to me was focusing on three key things he was going demonstrate:

Act hungry

Look great and assimilate to organizations style

Be clear about what he can do

I have a simple approach to any interview and it is based on the traits I value; attitude, agility and aptitude.  I know limiting myself to three my drive some people mad, but it helps simplifying things in general.

Attitude - If you are not emitting a positive and proactive mindset, then wow, what transpires when you are not around.

Agility - What percentage of job descriptions actually remain the same?  Based on the nature of the economy being in near constant market disruption organizations must be agile enough to adapt quickly to emerging trends impacting the business.  That translates to individuals being agile and open to new ways of doing things.  The combination of Attitude and agility is one powerful individual.

Aptitude - Are you qualified for the role, not in years of experience but in the ability to influence others and manage the span of control of the role.  Additionally this also refers to understanding the organization and the individual they are interviewing - doing your research and knowing your target is crucial in your aptitude for the role. With Google, there is no excuse for lack of preparation. 

It is better to be pleasantly surprised rather than unpleasantly unprepared.

Breakthrough your morning

Someone  used  to say they needed to get up at 3:30AM just to get a head start  in front of my morning thoughts and email.  While that is a little exaggeration the morning is extremely important for everyone. It is the foundation from which the day is built and how you choose to spend your morning can be used to predict what kind of day you’re going to have.

I have discussed the nature of success and how it requires some unconventional approaches to focus on what matters most. How can you expect to be successful if you’re not happy?  Money helps along the way, but only you can make yourself happy and successful from the inside out.  There isn’t any amount of money that can buy that.

Real happiness and success comes from the "quality of your attitude", your relationships, and the emotions you experience each day.  You can easily recognize those individuals with the victim mentality and that everything in life is the cause of others.  The attitude and mindset plays a specific role in happiness versus drama. How can you start to start? Start answering big questions about your life and move confidently in that direction with massive actions.

The big question for tomorrow morning - What is the most important thing I can do today for my own well-being? If you don’t take good care of yourself, then you can’t take good care of others either; which is why taking care of yourself is the best selfish thing you can do.

Every new day is a chance to change your life.  Work on making life all that you want it to be.  Work hard for what you believe, and keep your dreams big and your worries small.  Figure out how you can best serve yourself today.

Remember, you never need to carry more than you can hold, just take one step at a time.  The actions and the unconventional approaches require a massive shift in your mindset. And while you’re out there today making decisions instead of excuses, learning new things, the language used and getting closer and closer to your goals, know that there are others out there, like me, who admire your efforts and are striving for greatness too.

Breakthrough your morning

Being the Bar - Breakingthrough Goals

What does it mean to be succeed? Does it mean reaching a goal - or is it something related to consistency, maintainance and perseverance? So much of it is based on character, as one of my good friends and I discussed today, character is physical manifestation of intent and action.

We have predetermined notions of what is possible based on prior efforts and your own parameters. Limiting your objectives means you will Limit the actions to accomplish your goal. I see so many people underestimate themselves in what they can truly accomplish. When you limit yourself on goals you will limit your success - are you willing to put in the time? You can blame a ton of people to rationalize where you are in life. Blame yourself - tomorrow is a new day to commit yourself.

Setting massive goals, require massive thoughts and those thoughts require massive actions - pure and simple.

You may have to do things other people think are unreasonable to surpass your own goals.  Being unreasonable is about doubling, tripling, quadrupling your effort on a goal that is grounded in solid moral character and ethics.

Let's stop competing and start delivering excellence - herd mentality negates much of what can be accomplished. 

I used a latin phrase Fortuna Juvat "Fortune favors the Bold", in a recent discussion with a mentee and thought long and hard about that phrase. If marketplace only recognizes excellence, my question is simple what are you doing to manage your energies to focus on excellence? Stay focused on your own targets bold goals.

As long as you are alive you will do one of two things; accomplishing your goals or be used to accomplish someone else's goals. Focus on success that builds upon itself. Remember setting massive goals, require massive thoughts and those thoughts require massive actions - pure and simple.

Seize every opportunity today, tomorrow and the next day

Each new day is sincerely an opportunity.  Faced with many medical and personal challenges in my family and in my life, you have to extract the marrow out of life each and every day. The thing is, we just don’t know what tomorrow brings. Therefore we have to seize each day to do the things we want to do and say the things we believe are important.

Think of all the time wasted on the nonsense of anxiety and worry. The time we take up being unhappy, the time we use up worrying about the future or pondering the past is wasted. It is a wasted opportunity and a wasted privilege. I used to joke with a friend about Sunday Night Syndrome (the wash of panic of the coming work week).  With a little planning and positive enforcement it dissipates. Time wasted with unhappy and negative thoughts is time you will never ever get back.

Every now and then, and usually not very often, are some words spoken that deeply resonate with you. They make you stop and reflect. The words and their meaning will stay with you for a long time. They might even inspire or motivate you to do something different or to change direction. These words can come from quotes or personal affirmations.

My father always referenced the Latin phrase Carpe Diem - Seize the Day. The two words originate from a poem by Horace (65 BC-8 BC) and that they were used in a Babylonian Epic in which Siduri spoke them to urge Gilgamesh to forge his mourning and embrace life. Carpe Diem are two simple words with a significant amount of depth. They mean embrace life, grab the opportunities and make the most of the present moment. These two words helped me immensely at that point in my life and I have never forgotten them. 

Instead of pondering the past or worrying about the future, you should live in the here and now. We can waste so much time reflecting on the past, the things that happened, why they happened to us, what we did wrong. We can also waste so much time dreaming about a brighter future, about the things we would like to do or become one day. For me, Carpe Diem reminds me that yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet here, and today is your only chance to make a difference. If you make the most of today then you will live your life to the fullest.

We should see each day as a present and an opportunity. Every minute is valuable because you can use it to enjoy life, to get something started or to get something completed. The present moment is the only time in history that you can use to do good and to change for others and for the world - no matter how big or small.

Carpe Diem tells us to free ourselves from the worries, the anger and the negativity that is holding us back sometimes. It reminds us that it doesn’t matter where you came from, what you went through in the past; the only thing that matters is where you are going and that your future destination starts with the steps you take today. 

Today is your only chance to make a difference and live. Always remember that is in this moment, and only this moment, when you can be happy, you can say and do something, you can love, you can feel, you can enjoy and you can learn. 

Perspectives on wisdom and your own journey

1.  Wisdom is not about knowing all the answers.

It’s not the answers you get from others, or even the ones you formulate, that will help you in the long run.  It’s the simple questions you ask yourself on a regular basis that will determine the type of person you become.  Wisdom is about asking the right questions.

Regardless of your age or stature, life is always filled with unanswered questions.  It is the courage to ask these questions and adventurously seek the answers that continues to give life meaning.  Have patience with everything that remains unresolved in your heart.  Try to love the unanswered questions themselves.  Do not demand all the answers; they cannot be given to you because you have to live through them.  It is a matter of experiencing everything.  Only when you do will you gradually, perhaps without even noticing it, find yourself arriving at the answers you seek.

2.  Get out of your comfort zone -  You have to do lots of things you aren’t good at to grow.

If you do what you have always done, you will get the same results you have been getting.  If you want to stunt your growth and feel stuck in the same place forever, keep making excuses.  If, on the other hand, you want to stop feeling trapped, you have to start doing things that make you uncomfortable, things you aren’t very good at.  You have to streeeetch yourself.

There is no excuse for remaining stuck.  There is no excuse for doing the same things over and over again.  Life is too short.  Ask yourself if what you’re doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow.

The day is rapidly approaching when the risk to remain perched in your nest is far more detrimental than the risk it takes to fly.  Fly!  Start to Start and Start now.  What a dissappointment it would be for you to grow old without ever seeing the beauty and strength of your full potential.

3.  Everything you own has an emotional cost of ownership.

No matter what you own there is a maintenance cost.  We can speak in dollars – insurance, taxes and interest.  Or even in time – cleaning, updating and protecting.  But the hardest maintenance cost for most people is simply sentimental value.

We transfer our feelings and memories onto an object and decide we can’t let go because we’ll risk losing the feeling or memory.  Before long, we become surrounded by these visual reminders of our memories and no longer have room to make new ones.  It’s hard to move forward in your life when your past is crowding your present.

The answer, of course, is to get rid of some of this stuff.  But that’s way easier said than done.  We often need to be compelled to do this with a move or a lifestyle change.  Imagine how much richer life would be if you moved the junk out and made room for new opportunities instead of grudgingly making room only when it was forced upon you.  

4.  Characters character - flaws are beautiful and likeable.

Nothing is perfect; the world itself is not perfect.  But we’re all here living for our dreams and each other, trying the very best we can.  And that’s what makes us so darn beautiful.  The little things about you that you think are your flaws are often the reasons others fall in love with you.

Accept your flaws.  Admit your mistakes.  Don’t hide and don’t lie.  Deal with the truth, learn the lessons, endure the consequences of reality, and move on.  Your truth won’t penalize you.  The mistakes won’t hurt you.  The denial and cover-up will.  Polictical people are predictable. Liars and phonies are not.  Every human being is made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions and finished with unique edges shaped over time.

5.  The things you do for fun can pay the bills if you do them right.

Work, if it is interesting, is a stimulant.  It’s worry and a lack of interest in what you’re doing that drains and discourages you.  Every one of us should have our hobbies and side interests – as many as we can handle efficiently and happily.  Our interests should never be allowed to lag or get cold so that all enthusiasm and passion is wasted.  Each day can be a success if you feed your interests as graciously as they feed you.

Happiness is found where interests and capabilities intersect.  If you do what you love and then master it so you can do it much better than anyone else you know, it is entirely possible to make a living from it.  Even better, you will not get tired out from working when your work interests you.  The key is to find the point at which what you love, what you’re good at, and what people will pay for, intersect.

6.  How are you going to make someone successful today? 

Some of the most unpleasant people just need a little help. Provide support when it makes sense, even when people are cold and unfriendly.  Some people are rude and complain as a way of crying for help.  They may not be conscious of it though, so their comments come across as attacks rather than requests. Resist the urge to judge or assume.  It’s hard to offer compassion when you assume you have them figured out.  Let them know they are not alone. 

7.  Take time to think

Sometimes you need to be alone… not to be lonely, but to enjoy some free time just breathing and being YOU.

In order to be one with your relationships and life’s work, you have to turn away from the busyness of the world for a while.  You need to find solitude to refuel.  You must become so alone that you withdraw into your innermost self.  You must do nothing at all, except to be still with the moment.

You need to ponder your successes and failures in seclusion; you need the sunshine and the moonlight to warm you without companions to distract you, without the ongoing banter, face to face with your inner core.

Adapt or Die

Adapt or Die – searching for innovative ways to develop a system, a team and oneself is not as elusive as you think.

Moneyball was a great movie for a myriad of different reasons, but it reminded me of the search for innovative ways to develop a system, team and oneself.  There were many one-liners in the movie, but "adpat or die", was born out of pure frustration which many of us can empathize with in our daily rituals of using the same methods to try and return different results.

It seems to me that there is a significant amount of discussion regarding innovation across a multitude of organizations to gain a competitive advantage.  This advantage is not insulated to the surface of the organization, but rather down to the individual.

Innovation and reinvention is often dormant for individuals and managers across a majority of organizations due to the simple fact that these individuals have not learned to lead effectively.  The majority of activity is focused on transactional tasks and people need to reply on others in order to effectively innovate.

Individuals cannot be forced to actively engage, collaborate and share their creativity, but they can be led with an attitude of community building and collaboration. Just as you cannot instruct a child to go play and be happy with others. Organizations are comprised of individuals and we often lose sight of this fact - People do things for their reasons, not yours.  Our primary goal as organizational leaders and contributors is to influence and enhance the potential of the collective group – it must start at the individual level through conversations and dialogue.  

There is a specific level of reciprocity that must be balanced with the individuals contributions as well.  Innovation in what we do and how we do things requires a balance of influence and then personal accountability. People can make excuses and separate from their own evolution.

There are two specific goals one as a leader and two as an individual:

·         As a leader – to help people achieve those things they did not think were possible, by combining both divergent and convergent thinking.

·         As an individual - to take concrete action daily, to grow as a person - make a positive incremental difference whatever you do, wherever you are, within your circle of influence, starting with self.