Everyone wants to rule their own world and have control. Everyone wants a happy ending, but guess what – life is not perfect. The subtle art of influence is about kicking yourself into gear to inspire movement and motivation. It cannot be about negative commentary to yourself, but about committing yourself to a broader plan of attack.
Complaints and vetting are sometimes cathartic, but you need to move from “complaint to commitment”. Commit to a plan and execute using other friends, advocates and stakeholders in the process. Sometimes we get so caught up in what everyone else is doing and telling us that we need to do that we stop listening to the signals that our bodies are sending us. If something feels wrong, it probably is.
Sometimes the stress that we place on ourselves for results, in and of itself, enough to make us sick and unsuccessful in our endeavors. We get so obsessed with trying to ‘feel’ an effect from something that we can actually create that effect or symptom. I’m not joking. I’ve done it to myself and I see it over and over again in the misguided and futile attempts – this is small stuff and obsessing about it is sucking the life out of you. It’s NOT okay to spend your life caught up in the idea that life sucks because you are not making the right amount of money, have a specific title, weigh a certain amount or because you look a certain way. Until you start to truly value yourself – where you are and for who you are – you aren’t going to find happiness.
So the fine art of influence is about motivating yourself to live and be the best you that you can be – because that’s enough. What about working harder than anyone else? While it may not appear to many people that know me, my confidence is not based purely on my innate talents, it is based on fact that I try to work harder than anyone else. A good friend and associate joked around with me that he would have to get up at 3:45AM to get a jump start on me – get ahead of my morning emails, rants, celebrations and personal expectations. The reality is that is when everything kicks into gear for me. Let me reiterate the concept “for me”. This is about motivating yourself to suck the marrow out of life and living every day like it is your last or think of living one life in one day.
It is true that that hard work doesn’t always equal success. Some people work very hard, but fail for a myriad of reasons. They tried and didn’t succeed. The simple fact is that people tried...and there is a subtle difference in what I just referenced – “hard work doesn’t always guarantee success, but working harder than anyone else opens unique opportunities and insights if you are paying attention”.
